Knowing

Because it wasn't supposed to be like this. That's all I know. When people ask me what I need, I can't answer. Because I just don't know. I don't know what's going to make me feel better. I don't know what's going to stop my crying. I just don't know. And I hate it. I …

Just Look

I'm sure I've written something similar before. Something along these same lines. I know, because I remember crying out to Him, asking Him "why" over and over again. I already know the answer. And I'm sort of grateful for that. Because I'm not in this place of wondering anymore. Because I know. I think back …

Lesson Learned

Because I learned something today. Something big. From someone small. It started on the way home from school. "Someone called me ugly today," she told me from the backseat. "Oh yeah? What happened?" I pretended not to be upset, but inside I was fuming. Thinking of all the things I would say to this person. …

Cardigan

Because I was that girl. Because I can still remember the first time a man put his hands on me. I remember the way it felt. I remember the way it made me feel. And I remember thinking he wouldn't do it again. But I was wrong. Because I was the girl who swore up …

Impossible

Because this morning I woke up with a thousand things on my mind. He wasn't one of them. Completely stressed out. Full of worry. With a to-do list a mile long. And yet, He insisted I come spend some time with Him. ‘The rest of the world can wait,’ He said. I fought His calling …

Here I Am

Because I can still remember all the prayers I thought you forgot. The nights I spent crying. Asking you what I did to deserve any of this. Because I was miserable. I was lonely. And because I felt forgotten. But then here I am. And I am only here because of You. Because you pursued …

Catch Me

And I think my biggest fear is that one day I’ll wake up and realize it was never real.  That it was too good to be true. That I went and did it again.  Falling for the wrong guy.  That I will wake up and I won’t have my best friend anymore.  That it was …

Amen

Lord, thank you.  Thank you for this man. This amazing and perfect man. This man I never realized existed.  This man who changed everything.  Lord, thank you.  Thank you for sending me a man who loves You more than he loves himself. A man who knows You. A man who fears You. A man who …

Falling Short

I wish I could figure out the words.  The words to use to talk about this.  To talk about us. See? Words are my life. They are the one thing I know. The one place I feel the most comfortable. (Well, besides you.) And yet, with you, I fall short. Every time, I fall short.  …