Happy

People must think I’m crazy. 

I get that a lot. They take one look at me and they just don’t understand. 

I have been through so much. I have been through hell and back. I have been in constant battle with the enemy. I have a target on my back and I know it. 

I struggle. Everyday I struggle. With life. With finances. With worry. All of it. 

I am not immune to it, I promise. 

So then how am I so darn happy? 

You’d be surprised at how many times people ask me that. 

Well, that’s easy. I’m happy because of Him. 

What you see isn’t me. It’s Him. 

I have spent so much of my life being angry. Feeling sorry for myself. Being jealous. Hating myself. And quite frankly, I’ve had enough. 

Is my life perfect? Not even close, but He is. And because He is, He has graciously given me a heart of gratitude. 

Could I still feel sorry for myself? Absolutely. I busted my butt last month for work. Remember, I work in sales and solely for commission. And when my paycheck didn’t cover the bills this month I could have decided right then and there to be mad. 

And I did. For a little bit, I was mad. But want to know something? No matter how mad I was it still didn’t change the size of my bank account. But it did change my heart of gratitude. 

So I gave it to Him. He knew I was disappointed. He knew I didn’t like my situation, so I gave it to Him and He gave me His peace. 

So remember that when you see this girl. This girl who always seems to have a smile on her face. This girl who is so ‘glass half full’ it can make you sick. Know that you aren’t really looking at this girl, you’re looking at Him.

I would love to pray for you so please send me an email or leave a comment and let me know how I can pray for you today. 

In His Love, 

      Lauren 

4 thoughts on “Happy

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