Lesson Learned

I’m still not sure that I know what I’m doing most days. Chances are I probably don’t, but what I do know is that I’m just going to keep taking it one day at a time. 

One day at a time. Because that’s really all I can handle. 

This is hard, y’all. 

The tantrums. The tears. The whining. And then let’s talk about Jaxsyn. (See what I did there?) But seriously. 

While I wasn’t expecting homeschool to look like I just pinned it off of Pinterest and into my own home (okay, maybe part of me wishes that that would happen), I thought it would, well, look like something. 

Anything. 

But it’s just sort of everything and nothing all at the same time. 

From the outside it probably looks like we aren’t doing much. We start at 1pm. We end at 2pm. We just kind of do stuff. Some days we read more. Other days we work on the computer. And then there are days where we just cry and pout and sob about how much we don’t like school. 

I often wonder if I’m doing a disservice to Jaxsyn. He has been more than vocal about wanting to go to ‘real school’, but I just can’t help but think that’s not really for us. 

Had you told me 10 years ago that I would be homeschooling I would have rolled my eyes at you, but I can’t imagine not doing it. 

Whatever ‘it’ is that I’m doing. 

From the inside I see the progress. I see the hard work. I see the lessons learned, even those that are strictly meant for me. 

I hear the patience in my voice and I get to watch the moments where he not only makes me proud, but where he is proud of himself. 

I get to see the accomplishments. The moments between ‘having no clue’ and ‘knowing all the answers’. 

But most of all, I get to ask for help. I get to constantly rely on Him to get me through it. To get us through it. 

If nothing else, it will be the reminder that I desperately need Him. 

No matter what it is that I’m doing, I can’t do it without Him. Whether that’s teaching my children their ABC’s or forgiving my enemies, I need Him. 

Well now wait a minute and look at that. I think we’ve already learned a little something. 😉

 

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