Peace. Love. And Jesus.

First, let me begin by saying this post is not meant to hurt, upset, criticize, or call anyone out. Those are not my intentions. I am just confused and a little bit upset, but it is only my opinion so to my good friends who read this and think “Is she talking about me?” I might be, but again there are no ill-intentions here, I promise.

I am a Facebook junkie. There, I admitted it. I check Facebook on and off throughout the day. I love it. Thankfully, if I learn to keep my political rants to a minimum I don’t have much drama like some others have. I enjoy scrolling through and seeing what everyone is up to. I enjoy keeping up with my friends and my extended family. I also like having support at my fingertips for breastfeeding, or attachment parenting, or other parental issues I may be having.

Some of my favorite things to see are what’s going on in people’s lives. Many of my friends, myself included, often ask for prayers when they will be going through something. And most people offer their prayers to them, but more often than not, I see something along the lines of “happy thoughts, good vibes, positive vibes”. I’m sorry, what??

I believe in the power of prayer. I know it works because it’s the only explanation out there for my life. I also know it works for people who aren’t believers who I’ve prayed for because doors have opened up for them too. You want proof? Just ask people who believe in prayer. But trust me, It wasn’t positive vibes or happy thoughts.

Okay, I know I probably just stepped on a whole bunch of toes, but I just don’t get it.

So here’s what I know. I know when I pray, I talk to God. I lay out my problem or my hope, or I just have a conversation with Him. I’m talking to Him. It’s just me and Him. I might not be able to hear Him talk back, but I know He’s listening and I know that He already knows what’s going to happen. Sometimes what I want happens, other times, more often than not, I find that my plan wasn’t really what was best for me. Thank God I have a God who knows way more than I do in those situations! But here’s where I get confused about positive vibes or happy thoughts. Who are you talking to? How do you send positive vibes or happy thoughts because when I imagine what I would do if I were sending out positive vibes or happy thoughts it goes something like this: “Please, let Sue get that job. She deserves it so much and I know just how happy she would be, please, please, please.” Now if I’m praying it would go like this: “Dear Lord, please let Sue get that job. She deserves it so much and I know just how happy she would be, please. Amen”. I mean, just a few more words and it’s the same request, scratch that, it’s the same prayer.

I don’t want to shove my religion down your throat, I mean, I do, but I won’t, because I know how that feels on the receiving end and it’s not fun. I know it’s hard to believe that someone, God, could have all this power and had done/do all these things. I know that. I even have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. But what I can tell you is that it isn’t about having all of the answers and knowing for certain because we don’t have all of the answers and I’m not sure that we ever will, but it’s just about faith. That’s it, just faith.

Maybe some people think that I’m crazy because I have faith. I get it, it sounds insane. But maybe I think some people are crazy because they send out positive vibes. :) You know what I think? And I’m only saying this from experience, I think that people don’t want to believe because A) It’s not fun B) You’re held accountable for all the crappy things you do in your life, C) People who should be leading you by example have strayed and made the religion/relationship with God all about themselves, therefore giving all of us a bad reputation and D) we are not a society that enjoys answering to someone else when clearly we know it all and we know better than anyone else. Am I right?? I’m not sure many people will admit I am right because it’s hard to admit, trust me, I know.

I know because I’ve been there. I still go there sometimes. I went there last week. I had a really hard week last week, nothing bad happened, but i just didn’t want to believe. I didn’t want accountability. I didn’t want to give up my control last week, but you know what? I was miserable. I was angry. I was stressed. Do I think God made me suffer because I was doubting our relationship? No way. He’s not like that. I suffered because I am human and that’s what happens when a human tries to take on the weight of the world.

My point is this, if positive vibes and happy thoughts are that similar to prayers, then what’s holding you back? I am probably the last person you should talk about religion with because often I sound like a stuttering, blubbering idiot, who fumbles on every word that falls out of her clumsy mouth. I don’t know much about the Bible. And I don’t have the facts down, but I’m as real as it gets. i still struggle. I still fall down. I don’t think I’m better than any of you. So talk to me, explain it to me. I want to know what it’s all about.

Oh and just so you know, Christians don’t have anything against positive vibes or happy thoughts, we just call it prayers. You say Toe-mah-toe, I say Toe-may-toe. :)

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