Recently Justin and I decided to go down to one car. Now I knew going down to one car would mean that I would be the one making the sacrifices. As I thought about the cost of having two cars and how I didn’t really use the car enough to justify the cost, I knew the decision was made.
It was true, I really didn’t go anywhere during the times Justin was at work, and so giving up the car during that time was easy. However, I wasn’t exactly thrilled about giving up one thing, church.
I’ve never really been the church going type. I mean, I’ve gone before, but it was more of a hassle to get me up and out the door. Not here though. I have completely fallen in love with my church. I look forward to going each week. I look forward to getting up and getting ready. It hasn’t been work at all.
I started going to HopePointe the week after Easter. When I stepped foot in the doors I knew that this was where I was supposed to me. It felt natural and it felt like I had been going there my entire life.
This church was different. They were friendly, and curious. They were genuine. They were happy. They didn’t judge and they were most of all, welcoming.
I have attended church ever since that first Sunday, only missing one service and that was the Sunday after giving birth to Adelaide. (And I only missed it because it was raining that day)
And so waking up this morning was weird. It was weird knowing that I wouldn’t be able to go to church. It made me sad. But then I realized something. It will be okay.
I’ve changed. I’m not sure if you can tell from the outside, if you’ve known me, but I’ve changed. You see, before if I was upset about something or I wasn’t getting my way I would get angry. Instead of turning to God I would blame God for my misfortunes. I would resent God, but not now. Now I realize that He has a plan for me and I don’t need to know what it is. He’s always been with me, through everything. He has never left me alone. He knows exactly what He is doing.
I’m not sure what has made me given up trying to control my own life, but I think after moving to Texas and having absolutely nothing I’ve learned that the one thing, person, I can count on is God. He is everywhere when you need Him. (And even when you don’t think you need Him He’s there)
Justin assured me that if I didn’t like not having a car and if his schedule didn’t change after football season then we would get another car. And I like that plan, but I know that God has a better plan. Recently Justin found out that there was a better position at his company. More money, better hours, less work, and wait for it…a company car. Now I don’t know what will happen, but I do know, that it was rare for that position to open up in this company. So, you see, God’s already busy working on the plan. He’s already showing us opportunities and open doors.
As I experience more and more of God’s love and His patience and His plans I realize that my wish for all of you is to be able to experience it too. He has changed me for the best. No longer do I spend my time worrying, or stressing out, but rather I’m genuinely happy. Like really, really happy.
And so I know I was sad to be missing church, but had I been able to go then I wouldn’t be spending my Sunday in bed, with both my kids curled up around me, reading, writing, and listening to God’s word.
See, I told you He knew what He was doing. :) :) :) And, so yeah, I’m okay with that.